


Promises

by drifting_i



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s10e18 Book of the Damned, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mid season 10, im not sorry, listen i wrote this at like 1 am
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-28
Updated: 2015-04-28
Packaged: 2018-03-26 04:05:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3836413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drifting_i/pseuds/drifting_i
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He hears the screams coming from Deans room and he runs, he almost breaks down the door only to find Dean dreaming<br/>and its so painful to see him like that, kicking and tossing that he wakes Dean up shaking him and screaming his name.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promises

The first night Castiel stays in the bunker since he got his grace back its when he realizes.  
Why Sam looks even more tired than usual and avoids looking at Dean in the mornings.

He hears the screams coming from Dean's room and he runs, he almost breaks down the door only to find Dean dreaming.  
It's so painful to see him like that, kicking and tossing that he wakes Dean up shaking him and screaming his name.

"Dean! Dean wake up! It's okay Dean" Castiel almost slaps him cause he's not waking up.

Dean stands up so quickly Cas doesn't even have time to move out of his way, he rises and his hand directly goes to hold the mark, groaning and gasping he pushes Cas away.  
"Get away from me! Cas, g-go away." Dean says while standing up and going as far away from Castiel as he possibly can in the room, he falls and lands on his side, groaning like he's hurt.  
And Castiel can't go, can't stop staring at what's left of Dean. He walks towards him slowly like he's approaching a scared animal.

"Cas! Cas make it stop! Make it stop please" Dean whimpers, cringing at what he just said.

"Dean? Dean look at me" Cas kneels beside him and grabs his shoulder  
"Dean please" he says his voice breaking

"Ca-as. Cas are my eyes black?!" He asks not letting go of the mark, his voice rising with panic.

"No, no Dean they are as green as always" he garbs Dean's face and forces him to look at his eyes  
"Dean it was just a dream its okay, everything's okay you didn't hurt anybody" this sentence throws Dean back into reality, because he wasn't expecting Cas to know what his dreams were about.  
When Sam woke him up (he's given up on trying to snap dean out of it) he always told him that Dean was fine. And that didn't help, cause it wasn't about Dean. It was about Sam, Cas, Charlie everyone Dean loves and Dean is afraid of hurting. 

So when Cas says this he just stares at the angel not quite understanding how he knew what to say, how to break Dean out of it.

"Cas" its all he can manage to say

"Come on Dean lets go to bed" he garbs Deans hands and pulls him up, guiding him to bed, so Dean follows him and sits on the bed and watches Cas leave

"Cas?" Dean takes courage when the door almost closes 

"Yes Dean?" He answers, head sticking behind the door

"Do you remember what you promised me?" Theres a pause. Heavy silence. Dean breaks it.  
"You have to kill me Castiel" The angel flinches and closes his eyes at hearing his full name being used in that propose, because Dean's being serious, he feels Dean's eyes burning into his skull but he refuses to open his eyes cause it's too much.

He thought these sensations would end when he got his grace back. But another part of him knows that this feeling in his chest has been there long before losing it. Cause he met Dean sooner.

Castiel breaks.  
All he mange to do is close his eyes and whisper a "yes"  
Until he feels Dean besides him, staring at him for so long, or maybe time just stopped right then and there.

"Cas?" that breaks the spell he was trapped into, and it hits him again, crushing his ribs and making it hard to breathe, he moves to the bed with Dean, clinging to his shirt and burying his face on the mans neck. He can feel Deans hesitant arms closing around him and that feeling goes away for a little while.

"Cas are you okay?" Dean asks worry clear on his voice. 

"Yes Dean yes, sorry for that" he says pulling away from the embrace. 

"Don't bullshit me Cas." Dean stares at him.  


"I cant Dean." Cas breaks eye contact and moves further off Dean.

"You cant tell me?" Dean frwons

"I can't do it Dean. I can't keep my promise" Castiel looks at the floor an forces his voice to remain neutral.

"But-" Dean starts to argue but then Castiel is standing up, eyes full of rage and to much emotion for him to be an angel.

"NO! No Dean I can't do that. You can't ask me to do that! You dont see how much you mean to me?! I gave everything for you! And now you are asking me to kill you?! To throw away all of this mutual sacrifice just because theres no easy cure? I refuse to do that Dean! You seriously can't expect me to keep that promise, as if I never experienced the feel of loss, of pain, of the pain that loss brings! Dean you really dont see how much do you mean to me!" Dean stares at him mouth open wide not sure how to react cause Cas just started screaming and arguing in enochian. 

So he does the only thing he can possibly think of. Even if its not rational.

He stands up, grabs Castiel's wrists and pulls him into a kiss shutting him up

"Thank you" Dean whispers against the angels lips, though he's not really sure of what he's thanking him for.

 

That morning Dean wakes up without blanket, pushed up to the edge of the bed, with hickeys all over his neck and collarbones. With the Marks arm thrown across Castiel. Who has his eyes closed but also has a small smile on his lips.

Its the first time he has properly slept since the Mark.

**Author's Note:**

> god season 10 fucked me up so much so heres something to make us feel better


End file.
